Because mediation is not adversarial, the process of making personal, financial and sensitive child-related decisions should consider everyone’s needs and best interest, rather than couples living with the result of arbitrary choices made through the legal system. According to MyDomaine, one of the reasons mediation is so successful is because it does not focus on the couple’s points of disagreement or their differences of opinion, like in the legal system.
No two divorces or families are the same. Mediators create the mediation process to fit the couple’s situation, unlike the legal system, where every divorce is forced into the same fix process regardless of the couple circumstances. In most divorces, couples tend to focus most of their energy and attention on their own positions, forgetting that their spouse has many of the same fears and concerns that they do. According to Forbes, this is why so much disagreement and hostility occurs between divorcing spouses. The process of mediation and a skilled mediator will help couples overcome these tendencies so that they can negotiate and solve their problems without their fears or emotions getting in the way of the decisions they have to make.
Mediation also allows couples to overcome their communication barriers, listen to each other’s points of view without feeling vulnerable or weak and cooperatively explore their options. All of these are difficult or impossible for couples to achieve on their own, but are really critical to creating an overall agreement that they can both live with. When couples have the proper tools to communicate, negotiate and solve problems, they are able to create divorce agreements and co-parenting relationships that will last.